Thursday, October 2, 2008

chipmunks

Chipmunks are the stupidest creatures on God's green earth.

They attack me every day I bike to work. Biking along, minding my own business, I have strange squirrels sitting around in the middle of the road who, as I approach them, suddenly dart for my wheel. It's a little disconcerting to see a flurry of black fur try and take a spin through my spokes.

Chipmunks are also expert tree navigators, except when those trees are located over streets. A squirrel once planned an aerial assault on my person by falling to the street from overhead. After a stunned pause, it shook its head and scurried off.

Chipmunks are also excellent musicians.

2 comments:

Julie said...

How can you get mad at them though? they are just so cute and fuzzy! if you run over any of them just remember you are cleansing their gene pool :)

MommaMcCarthy said...

woah woah woah. there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between chipmunks and squirrels.

-squirrels are creepy
-chipmunks have short tails
-squirrels stare at your food (with those beady little eyes) when you try to leave your office for the first (only) time during daylight hours to enjoy a nice picnic in the great outdoors and spoil all semblance of peace, for you can no longer eat casually but must wolf down said picnic so as not to be stolen and then work-break excuse gets cut much short.
-chipmunks are musical
-squirrels deserve to die if they attack your bike wheel

get it straight